Meet Big Brother, Asher - Day 40

Something different today.  It's been bothering me that my blog gives Asher a bad rep.  Cute kitten being bullied by a senior hardly paints Asher in a positive light.  But Asher is actually very sweet and cuddly.  So to celebrate day 40, I decided to do something different.  Don't worry, Phoenix will be back on Monday!

Looking for a Home

Nguyen and I had moved to a new home in 2017; it was a place that would allow us to have pets!  While both of us were more interested in a dog, our lifestyle and home situation wouldn't allow us to house a dog and take care of it properly.  So we decided that we would find a cat instead.

Not long after, Nguyen saw a post on the next door app of someone looking for a home for a cat.  The cat was very shy and needed a quiet home that didn't have other pets.  Here's the picture that was provided in that post:

The woman who posted was a vet tech who put food out for the outdoor cats in the neighborhood.  Asher was one of the cats who would come eat food at her place, but she realized he clearly was not an outdoor cat.  To keep him safe, she brought him into her home.  But she had many other pets, and Asher wasn't doing so well with that.

She eventually found him a home with children.  Unfortunately, Asher was returned to her.  He hadn't done well in the new home either.  It's not that he was aggressive or would attack anyone.  He was just very, very sad and would avoid people.

Welcome to the Family

But a quiet home without kids sounded like a perfect fit for us.  So we met Asher, a 6-7 years old at the time, and I brought him home with me in Valentine's Day of 2017!  Based off of advice we had received, we kept him in a single room.  This would make it easier to interact with him.  And honestly, it was the saddest thing ever.  He would sit in that room and stare at the wall.

The photos above are representative of our first 4 days.  He would eat his food and use the litterbox as long as we weren't around.  Otherwise, you'd almost always find him hiding in that corner (except for the one time I found him in the closet).  When I'd come home from work or on the days I would work from home, I'd sit in that room and work close by.  Occasionally, I would pull him out and into my lap.  He'd stay there and let me pet him, but then he'd eventually get up and walk into his corner.

And then one day, while we were both in the room, he walked out on his own!  He wanted to be pet!

Shortly after, we finally opened the door to that room and let him move freely around the house.  And over time, he became more and more cuddly.  He sleeps with us in our bed every night, and he will frequently come and hangout with me on the couch.  He's here with me right now!

He was still very skittish for many months.  If we came home from work, you'd always find him hiding under the couch.  Once he was convinced it was one of us, he'd finally come out.  The time to come out became shorter and shorter as the days went on.  Eventually, he got to the point where he would either stay lying down on the couch or would greet me at the door when we came home.

In fact, at one point, I had to call the vet to make sure that a cat that was insanely attached wasn't a problem (it wasn't!).  I'd come home and go to the bathroom, and he would cry at the bathroom door until I came out.  He would follow me around until I went to the couch to spend time with him.  Sometimes I'd be showering, and you'd hear him crying for me.  Our shy cat was still shy, but insanely cuddly with people that he knew and trusted.

Asher continues to be my main companion.  There is a chair in my office that I put next to me so that he can jump up and spend time with me.  He doesn't like to jump into my lab directly, but as long as he has a way to jump up next to me, he'll eventually walk on over into my lap.  Whether it be at the couch or at my desk, he's my buddy.

 

He also puts up with my crazy shenanigans from time to time.  Even if he does give me his glaring face for it.

But most of the time he's curled up sleeping somewhere nearby.  Either on the bed or the couch (neither of which Phoenix can get to at the moment).

But if he isn't sleeping in one of the usual spots, you can usually find him in a couple of spots.  He hangs out sitting in front of his automatic feeder usually around 4 to 5am, waiting for it to dispense his food at 5:15am.  Or he might hangout on a windowsill checking out the world.

Adjusting to Phoenix

Asher is definitely not a fan of change.  But our hopes is that Phoenix is tiny enough that Asher will grow to be more comfortable with him.  He's already starting to get there.  He generally seems more relaxed with Phoenix around, though he definitely still is on edge.  He's fine with me petting him with Phoenix nearby and has stopped randomly hissing at me during those moments.

He still hisses at Phoenix from time to time, but it seems that Phoenix is also starting to learn to give big brother some space.  Though in the last couple of days, Asher showed some interest in playing a bit more with the little guy.  I think this is a good sign!  Though I can't tell if Asher wants to play with him... like, together with him.  Or if he wants to play with him, as if he's some kind of toy 😂.  But all in all, I think these are signs of improvement!  Take a look and let me know what you think!

Phoenix was playing behind the litter.  Then Asher ran over!

Playing around the cactus.  This went well!

Playing around the cactus, part 2.  All things considered, this went well, too.  He did hiss, but then he walked away and moved on.  This is significant progress in my opinion!

Don't worry - we'll be back to our regularly scheduled Phoenix programming on Monday!  Hopefully you enjoyed the change of pace today!